No one likes to be lonely, but many people love to be–and live–alone. If you’ve ever been labeled a “loner,” it probably wasn’t intended as a compliment. This label carries connotations of the weird neighborhood recluse with the cluttered yard or the pale Goth teenager who stays inside playing video games all day. The truth is that true loners enjoy being by themselves. They choose it, finding more contentment having themselves as their only company. The solitary life appeals to them.
There are a variety of reasons why a person prefers to be alone. They may be introverted, enjoying the freedom from having to engage socially on a constant basis. Studies that surveyed those unafraid to be single, however, indicates that it’s not just about a preference for isolation. Measuring 5 major personality characteristics (neurotic, open, extraverted, agreeable, and conscientious), the results found the opposite of one would expect. The participants who were not afraid to be single and live alone were less likely to be neurotic and more likely to be open-minded, agreeable, and conscientious. (1)
Being a loner, then, is actually a strength. Having the self-assurance and confidence to live alone shows a level of contentment and well-being with yourself–while not necessarily meaning you don’t enjoy people at all. You may just enjoy your space, choosing when and how you want to socialize.
6 Traits Typical Of Those Who Are Born To Live Alone
If you can identify with 5 out of these 6 traits, chances are that living alone is right for you. We won’t say it’s your destiny, but then again…it just might be!
1. You hate drama and try to stay away from it.
Like most people, loners tend to get along best with those who share similar qualities and personality traits with them. People who are overly extroverted may bring drama with them, which you have little patience for. People who are too indecisive or irrational tend to rub you the wrong way–and you’d rather steer clear of them. You tend to stay away from large social groups as well, where drama can often flourish. You’d rather have a meaningful conversation with someone, one-on-one.
2. Time is valuable to you.
You value time, both your own and that of others. You’re usually punctual, preferring to spend your time wisely and on things that are worthwhile to you. Valuing time makes you dependable and trustworthy, and people find you reliable.
3. You’re aware of your capabilities.
You know your likes and dislikes and your strengths and weaknesses. In difficult situations, you’re confident in your ability to remain composed and avoid panicking.
4. You have clear personal boundaries that are very important to you.
Because you enjoy spending time alone, you’re careful to allow unwanted or uncomfortable intrusions into your space. You, in turn, are careful not to invade other people’s personal boundaries. People appreciate this and enjoy being around you.
5. You’re intuitive and empathic.
Because you like spending time alone, you’re very in tune with your feelings. This self-awareness makes it easy for you to understand others very well, and you can easily put yourself in someone else’s shoes.
6. You love yourself.
In order to spend so much time alone, you have to truly love yourself–and you do. You accept your flaws while working to better yourself and improve on your qualities, both good and bad.
It’s okay to be a loner, and you might be one of the strong, self-assured personalities that can live alone. If so, celebrate your ability to rely on yourself, but don’t forget to make time to reconnect with those around you. You have many great qualities to offer, and the world could use someone like you.