Why ‘Tossing’ Your Clutter Might Signal ADHD, According to Experts

Picture a cardboard box shoved in the corner of your bedroom. Inside sits a jumble of old receipts, expired gift cards, mysterious charging cables, and paperwork from three jobs ago. You’ve moved it from closet to desk to floor and back again. Every time you see it, a familiar wave of dread washes over you. One day, something snaps. You grab the box, march to the trash bin, and dump everything inside. No sorting. No second-guessing. Just relief.

If you’ve ever done something like that, you’re not alone. Mental health professionals now recognize patterns in how people manage clutter, and one behavior keeps surfacing in conversations about ADHD. Psychologists have started paying attention to what happens when an organization becomes so overwhelming that destruction feels like the only way out.

What DOOM Piles Are and Why Everyone Has Them

 

 

 

 

 

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Last summer, TikTok users began sharing a term that resonated across millions of views. DOOM piles became shorthand for a specific kind of mess. DOOM stands for “didn’t organize, only moved,” and anyone who’s ever relocated a stack of mail from the kitchen counter to the bedroom dresser knows exactly what that means.

A DOOM pile might be that junk drawer where expired coupons live alongside loose batteries and random keys that unlock nothing you still own. It could be a shopping bag full of items you meant to return but never did. Perhaps it’s a box of office supplies from a previous job mixed with birthday cards, broken sunglasses, and subscription renewal notices you’ve been ignoring for months.

People create DOOM piles not out of laziness but out of survival. When faced with items that don’t have obvious homes, the brain makes a quick calculation. Sorting takes time and mental energy. Moving everything into one spot takes seconds. So into the pile it goes, with good intentions to deal with it “later.”

Except later rarely comes. Instead, the pile grows. More items join the collection. Days turn into weeks, weeks into months, and suddenly that manageable stack has become an archaeological dig of postponed decisions.

Meet Tossing and Its Quick Relief Promise

Enter tossing, a coping mechanism that’s exactly as blunt as it sounds. When DOOM piles reach critical mass, some people bypass the entire organization process. Rather than sorting through items one by one, determining what stays and what goes, they eliminate the whole problem in one sweep. Everything hits the trash or donation bin together.

Cate Osborn, an ADHD advocate and educator known online as Catieosaurus, has experience with tossing. She hosts the podcast “Sorry, I Missed This” and speaks openly about her relationship with clutter. Osborn describes a familiar pattern that starts with good intentions.

She’ll begin organizing her desk, but inevitably, some items lack designated storage spaces. Into a box they go, with plans to sort them later that same day. But then, later arrives, and her focus has evaporated. Days pass. When she finally remembers the box exists, she’s usually in the middle of another task. So it waits longer.

Eventually, she faces the box again, only to experience what psychologists call choice paralysis. Should she keep each item? What if she needs it someday? What if it proves useful later? Questions multiply faster than answers, and more boxes accumulate. Finally, one day, she makes a decision. Out everything goes, usually to a donation center.

Osborn admitted in a recent interview, “It’s not something that I would brag about or say that I’m particularly proud of, but I do know what it’s like to be so completely overwhelmed that it’s easier to say ‘you know what, I don’t need any of this’ and just throw everything away.”

How ADHD Brains Process Clutter Differently

Understanding tossing requires understanding how ADHD affects executive function. Executive dysfunction refers to challenges with starting tasks, determining what steps a task requires, and maintaining focus long enough to complete those steps. For people with ADHD, what looks like one simple action to others actually fragments into dozens of smaller decisions.

Consider that box of miscellaneous items. Someone without ADHD might see a 20-minute organizing task. Someone with ADHD sees a different picture entirely. Each object in the box demands its own series of micro-decisions. Does it have value? Where should it live? Do I need to buy storage for it first? Should I check online to see if it’s worth selling? What about that other thing I was supposed to do today?

Working memory challenges compound the problem. ADHD brains struggle to hold multiple pieces of information simultaneously. So when organizing requires remembering where different items belong, maintaining focus on the current object, and resisting distraction from more interesting items in the pile, the cognitive load becomes staggering.

Madison Perry, a psychologist and owner of Austin Holistic Psychology, has heard clients discuss tossing behaviors. She offers a helpful analogy. People with ADHD “have too many mental tabs open at once,” Perry explains. Each item in a clutter pile represents another browser tab demanding attention and processing power. Eventually, the system overloads.

Imagine your computer slowing to a crawl because you have 47 tabs open. What do you do? You close them all at once. Risky? Absolutely. Some tabs might have contained important information. But the relief of a clean slate feels worth it. Tossing operates on similar logic. Throwing something away removes it from the overwhelming mental to-do list instantly.

Executive Dysfunction Drives the Tossing Impulse

Oliver Drakeford, a psychotherapist practicing in West Hollywood, California, explains that tossing connects directly to executive dysfunction. Rather than representing impulsive decluttering, tossing functions as an automatic, reactive behavior. People with ADHD use it to avoid feelings that arise when their brains become overstimulated by clutter.

“It’s not just impulsive decluttering; for many people with ADHD, it’s an automatic, reactive behavior that helps people avoid feelings of uncertainty, anxiety and overwhelm that arises when the brain is overstimulated by a big pile of clutter or mess,” Drakeford notes.

Visual clutter creates a particular kind of stress for ADHD brains. Every visible item broadcasts a silent demand for attention and action. Unopened mail whispers about potential bills. Random objects scattered across surfaces represent unfinished projects and broken routines. Stacks of papers embody decisions not made and systems that failed.

When faced with this overwhelming input, the ADHD brain searches for an escape route. Tossing provides one. It transforms a complex, multi-step organizational challenge into a single action. Pick up. Throw away. Done. Instant relief floods in, replacing anxiety with accomplishment.

Experiential Avoidance Plays a Role Too

Psychologists recognize another mechanism at work in tossing behavior. Experiential avoidance describes attempts to escape uncomfortable internal experiences such as thoughts, feelings, memories, or physical sensations. People engage in experiential avoidance even when doing so creates problems down the line.

Drakeford offers an example. Rather than feeling the anxiety generated by looking at accumulated letters and bills, someone might avoid those feelings temporarily by throwing everything into a drawer. Out of sight, out of mind, at least until later. But later brings its own stress when important documents have vanished into the chaos.

Tossing represents an attempt to generate feelings of tranquility that a blank slate provides. Clean surfaces and empty spaces feel peaceful. For people with ADHD, tossing delivers those feelings immediately. It feels like winning because it brings instant relief.

But psychologists caution that tossing functions more like a Band-Aid covering deeper emotional wounds. Uncertainty and overwhelm don’t disappear just because clutter does. In fact, avoiding those uncomfortable feelings prevents people from developing distress tolerance, the ability to withstand emotional discomfort without immediately reacting to eliminate it.

When Tossing Crosses Into Problem Territory

Not all tossing creates problems. Sometimes throwing things away makes perfect sense. Moldy takeout containers, expired medications, and broken electronics deserve the trash. But tossing becomes problematic when it’s indiscriminate.

Perry has worked with clients who accidentally discarded important items during tossing episodes. Medical forms, tax documents, work files, and sentimental objects disappeared in moments of overwhelm. “They were in that much of a rush to declutter,” Perry explains about her clients’ experiences.

Beyond losing important items, tossing can trap people in a frustrating cycle. DOOM piles accumulate. Stress builds. Tossing provides relief. But without developing better organizational strategies, new DOOM piles form almost immediately. Months later, the pattern repeats. People find themselves back where they started, feeling powerless over their physical spaces.

Drakeford points out another concern. While tossing delivers short-term calm, it doesn’t build long-term skills. Managing ADHD well requires learning how to tolerate uncomfortable feelings, break large tasks into smaller steps, and create systems that work with how ADHD brains function. Tossing bypasses all of that learning.

Recognizing Your Emotional State Before You Toss

Breaking free from the tossing cycle starts with awareness. Before grabbing that box and heading to the trash, pause. What emotions are present? Anxiety? Stress? Shame about the mess? Exhaustion from trying to keep up with organization systems that never seem to work?

Drakeford emphasizes that awareness creates options. “If you’re not conscious of feelings like anxiety, uncertainty, or stress, you’re more likely to operate on autopilot and resort to tossing things impulsively,” he explains. But recognizing emotional states creates space to address and soothe those feelings in healthier ways.

Awareness doesn’t mean tossing is off limits. Sometimes, after checking in with yourself, tossing still makes sense. But making that choice consciously, rather than reactively, changes everything. Mindful tossing acknowledges the emotions and makes an informed decision anyway. Reactive tossing operates on panic and avoidance.

Break Tasks Down with Practical Games

ADHD brains often assume they must accomplish everything simultaneously. A pile of clutter becomes “clean the entire room,” which feels impossible. Stress spikes. Tossing beckons as the only escape.

Breaking overwhelming tasks into smaller pieces changes the equation. Drakeford recommends the “10 Things Game.” Instead of tackling an entire stack of bills, start by opening just 10. Instead of cleaning the whole kitchen, begin with washing 10 dishes. Completing small tasks feels manageable, and momentum often builds naturally. After finishing 10 items, doing 10 more seems possible.

Another useful approach is the Two-Minute Rule. If a task takes less than two minutes to complete, do it immediately. After breakfast, take two minutes to wash your cereal bowl instead of letting it join the sink’s growing collection. Open that piece of mail right now rather than adding it to the pile. Small actions prevent new DOOM situations from forming.

Setting Boundaries on What Actually Needs Tossing

Some things genuinely need to go. Osborn acknowledges that sometimes drastic measures make sense. Spoiled food, moldy dishes, and broken items that can’t be repaired fall into that category. If being surrounded by unsanitary conditions impacts quality of life, throwing things away becomes self-care rather than avoidance.

But for everything else, slower approaches work better. Consider whether items could be donated rather than trashed. Evaluate whether papers could be photographed or scanned before disposal. Ask if objects could be stored in clear, labeled bins where they remain accessible but organized.

Creating boundaries helps, too. Designate one location for incoming papers, with a specific day each week to sort through them. Use clear storage containers instead of opaque boxes that hide contents. Label everything clearly so future-you knows what’s inside without opening every container.

ADHD Is Not Laziness or Poor Character

Perhaps most important to understand is what tossing reveals about ADHD itself. When people resort to wholesale decluttering, they’re not being lazy or careless or immature. Osborn reads comments on ADHD articles regularly and sees harsh judgments. People call it laziness, lack of effort, or moral failing.

But ADHD represents a disability of executive function. Brains process information differently, and those differences become pronounced in situations involving organization. What looks like a simple sorting task to one person represents hundreds of micro-tasks to someone with ADHD. Each small decision drains energy and focus.

“To the ADHD brain, it’s a series of hundreds of much smaller tasks, all of which are taking energy to process,” Osborn explains. Feeling so overwhelmed by possessions that throwing everything away seems like the only option doesn’t feel good. It happens as a last resort, when every other approach has failed or feels impossible.

Better organizational strategies exist. Websites, podcasts, books, and ADHD coaches offer tools specifically designed to work with ADHD brains rather than against them. For parents raising children with ADHD, teaching organization skills early makes a meaningful difference. But those skills look different from traditional organizational advice. They account for executive dysfunction, working memory challenges, and the way ADHD brains process visual information and decisions.

Working With Your Brain Instead of Against It

Tossing behavior offers a window into how ADHD brains navigate a world designed for neurotypical organization systems. When clutter becomes cognitively overwhelming, drastic measures feel necessary. But understanding why tossing happens opens doors to better solutions.

Organization doesn’t require color-coded filing systems or Pinterest-perfect closets. It can be as simple as clear bins with visible contents, single landing spots for incoming items, and compassionate acceptance that some days will be messier than others. Building systems that acknowledge ADHD challenges, rather than pretending they don’t exist, creates sustainable change.

Recognizing tossing as a symptom rather than a character flaw shifts the conversation. It’s not about trying harder or caring more. It’s about understanding how different brains work and providing tools that match those neurological realities. When people with ADHD feel empowered rather than ashamed, they build skills that actually stick. And sometimes, they even keep the box instead of tossing it.